On The Occasion Of Leo Tolstoy's 186th Birthday

"And a terrible thing is music in general. What is it? Why does it do what it does? They say that music stirs the soul. Nonsense! A lie! It acts, it acts frightfully (I speak for myself), but not in an exalting way. It acts neither in an exalting nor a debasing way, but in an agitating way. How shall I say it? Music makes me forget my real situation. It transports me into a state which is not my own. Under the influence of music I really seem to feel what I do not feel, to understand what I do not understand, to have powers which I cannot have. Music seems to me to act like yawning or laughter; I have no desire to sleep, but I yawn when I see others yawn; with no reason to laugh, I laugh when I hear others laugh. And music transports me immediately into the condition of soul in which he who wrote the music found himself at that time. I become confounded with his soul, and with him I pass from one condition to another. But why that? I know nothing about it? But he who wrote Beethoven's 'Kreutzer Sonata' knew well why he found himself in a certain condition. That condition led him to certain actions, and for that reason to him had a meaning, but to me none, none whatever. And that is why music provokes an excitement which it does not bring to a conclusion. For instance, a military march is played; the soldier passes to the sound of this march, and the music is finished. A dance is played; I have finished dancing, and the music is finished. A mass is sung; I receive the sacrament, and again the music is finished. But any other music provokes an excitement, and this excitement is not accompanied by the thing that needs properly to be done, and that is why music is so dangerous, and sometimes acts so frightfully. "In China music is under the control of the State, and that is the way it ought to be. Is it admissible that the first comer should hypnotize one or more persons, and then do with them as he likes? And especially that the hypnotizer should be the first immoral individual who happens to come along? It is a frightful power in the hands of any one, no matter whom. For instance, should they be allowed to play this 'Kreutzer Sonata,' the first presto,—and there are many like it,—in parlors, among ladies wearing low necked dresses, or in concerts, then finish the piece, receive the applause, and then begin another piece? These things should be played under certain circumstances, only in cases where it is necessary to incite certain actions corresponding to the music. But to incite an energy of feeling which corresponds to neither the time nor the place, and is expended in nothing, cannot fail to act dangerously."  --Pozdnyshev to the narrator
(The Kreutzer Sonata, Tolstoy's Short Fiction, Norton Critical Edition, pp.180-81)

NEWSFLASH! SPLISH! SPLASH!

Word in Tinseltown is that newly divorced rocker Neil Young who you might know from CSN is currently "producing his own re-boot of Clan Of The Cave Bear" with sexy silver screen siren (or mermaid) Darryl Hannah! Insiders are already calling her the "classic rock Eva Prinz", for some reason, though I don't understand this joke.

Music legend and unlikely voice of reason, David Crosby had this to say to the Idaho Statesman this past Sunday, "And I happen to know that he's hanging out with somebody that's a purely poisonous predator now. And that's karma. He's gonna get hurt. But I understand why it happened. I'm just sad about it. I'm always sad when I see love get tossed in the gutter."

SINGLE CELL ORGANISMS

Coming soon from Fluxlife Inc- the latest release from the Rich Millett Archive Project- Single Cell Organisms- an audio collage/experiment/documentary assembled out of recordings from Dec. '89 - Dec. '91

(kicking and screaming, against our will) we're b-b-b-back!!!

Wedding!

A Brief Look At "Grandma" Candy

1) Starlight Mints
2) Butterscotch hard candy in sunshine yellow tinted wrappers
3) those weird strawberry hard candies in the wrapping paper designed to look like a strawberry, with that gross red syrup inside,
4) Root Beer hard candy shaped like little barrels
5) Brach's tri-coloured square shaped candy, originally chewy- been in the dish for so many years, it's now stale
6) Brach's tube shaped caramel candy with that weird pink glop on the end.
7) ONE Tootsie Roll.  Dig all you want, you'll never find another.  Remove it, it's magically replaced.
8) Those oval pale green or pale pink things that turn out to to be black licorice in disguise
9) Some Grandmas had circus peanuts in plentiful supply.  Not mine, though.
10) Halloween for Grandma doesn't mean fun size Snickers, it means candy corn.
11) Ribbon candy.  Another one my Grandmother never, ever had.
12) Werhters originals
13) Nips.  I used to work with this horrible, flatulent old woman named Bernie, who sucked on Nips all the live long day.
14) Little lemon wedges w/ jelly-like texture
15) Jimmy Nokes' Grandma had a dish full of just good'n'plenty's.  Obviously, she was evil.

special mention) cod liver oil pills

add your own!

NEW FROM FLUXLIFE INC.! ARTCORE NAKED (DELUXE EDITION)!

The Rich Millett Archive Project releases another oddity from the Fluxlife Inc. Vaults®!

Back in April 1994, a young Richard Millett was bored and disgusted with his "creative" writing class, and rebelled in the only way he knew how...by using his school's resources to create and print a new batch of poems in just a few days.  Long out of print, Artcore Naked was either totally uknown, or magically mythical, depending on who you asked (and how sane they are).

Now (like everything else from the 90's) it's back in action!  Also included for your enjoyment and edification are Rich's original rough (or "ruff") drafts from these writing sessions.  From the Nazareth computer labs to your iPad!

Check it out now!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/225726452/Artcore-Naked-Deluxe-Edition

THE HORROR, THE HORROR

Hey there, you with the stars in your eyes...

INTERESTING

http://www.pinterest.com/scottwarmuth/a-tempest-commonplace/

http://newhavenreview.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/01/NHR-006-Warmuth.pdf

What The Fuck Is That Vibe Like?!

THE SEVEN ETERNAL CIRCLES OF BOB DYLAN!

I, Richard Matthew Michael Joseph Millett IV have created the ultimate, final, and above all else, perfect ranking of Bob Dylan's oeuvre.  I truly channeled my inner Christgau.  This is it.  The ultimate argument ender.  I ask you to bask in the warmth of my creation.

FIRST TIER: PERFECTION AS SMOOTH AS A RHAPSODY
1- Blonde On Blonde- Masterpiece
1a- Blood On The Tracks- Masterpiece
2- Highway 61 Revisited- Masterpiece
3- John Wesley Harding- Masterpiece

SECOND TIER: UNFUCKWITHABLE GREATNESS FOR THE AGES
4- Tempest- Goddamn Genius
5- Desire- Perfect
6- Bringing It All Back Home- Perfect
7- Bootleg Series Vol. 4: Live 1966, "Royal Albert Hall" Concert- Perfect- but why stop here?
8- “Love and Theft”- Near Perfect
9- Another Side Of Bob Dylan- Perfect
10- The Times They Are a-Changin’- Perfect
11- World Gone Wrong- Perfect
12- The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan- Near Perfect
13- Time Out Of Mind- Near Perfect
14- Modern Times- Near Perfect
15- Hard Rain- Those ducklings couldn't see the swan was beautiful
16- Bootleg Series Vol. 9: The Witmark Demos: 1962–1964- Suspension of disbelief
17- Oh Mercy- Near Perfect, shame about Disease Of Conceit

THIRD TIER: U STILL CAN'T TOUCH THIS
18- Bootleg Series Vol. 6: Live 1964, Concert at Philharmonic Hall- Mask-erading
19- Bootleg Series Volumes 1–3 (Rare & Unreleased) 1961–1991- A comma not a period
20- Street Legal- Startling, Strange, Suffocating
21- New Morning- Placid, Peaceful, Pleasant
22- Together Through Life- BYOB
23- Infidels- Coulda been a contender
24- Planet Waves- Looking back with awe
25- In Concert - Brandeis University 1963- Tougher than nails
26- Biograph- A true musical joyride
27- Bob Dylan's Greatest Hits Vol. II- The Chronicles of its time
28- Bootleg Series Vol. 5: Live 1975, Rolling Thunder Revue- 15 discs too short.  Bootlegs ahoy!
29- Before the Flood- The eternal battle of good vs. evil
30- Bootleg Series Vol. 8: Tell Tale Signs: Rare/Unreleased 1989–2006- Studying the stetson
31- Good As I Been To You- Saturdays
32- Slow Train Coming- Sundays
33- Shot Of Love- Monday

FOURTH TIER: U COULD CERTAINLY DO WORSE
34- Bob Dylan- Wheat vs. chafe
35- Nashville Skyline- Mint juleps vs. Michelob
36- Empire Burlesque- Nice cloth vs. bad tailoring
37- The Bootleg Series Vol. 10: Another Self Portrait (1969–1971)- Charmed, I'm sure
38- Pat Garrett & Billy The Kid- Ennio Eno
39- 'The Copyright Extension Collection Vol. I'- The truth shall set you free
40- Bootleg Series Vol. 7: No Direction Home: The Soundtrack- This store is sorta cool

FIFTH TIER: ...AND YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS WEBERMAN?
41- Live at the Gaslight 1962- Bootlegs are better
42- Live at Carnegie Hall 1963- Bootlegs are better revisited
43- Live 1961–2000: Thirty-Nine Years of Great Concert Performances- Remember this one?
44- Masterpieces- Still necessary after all these years
45- Traveling Wilburys Vol. 1 (1988)- The Liquid lunch
46- Traveling Wilburys Vol. 3 (1990)- The Afternoon Crash
47- Bob Dylan's Greatest Hits- It's been done

SIXTH TIER: TOO MUCH MIXED UP CONFUSION
48- Self Portrait- Shit can come out green?
49- Christmas in the Heart- Battery acid Bing
50- The Basement Tapes- Fuck this, find the bootlegs
51- Real Live- Um, technically
52- Under The Red Sky- Lite'n'lively'n'scowling
53- MTV Unplugged- I thought that sign read "apple sauce"!
54- Bob Dylan's Greatest Hits Volume 3- Grizzled, chained, drained, and gated (drums)
55- Bob Dylan at Budokan- Diamond Dylan.  As in Neil.
56- 30th Anniversary Concert Celebration- Bob Bored.  Sinead Booed.  Wood Not Good.

SEVENTH TIER: ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO ENTER HERE
57- Down In The Groove- Gets it over with
58- Saved- Doomed
59- Knocked Out Loaded- Martland's Syndrome
60- The Essential Bob Dylan- Talkin' 60's Fixation Blues
61- Dylan- What about Bob?
62- Blues- Biege
63- Dylan & the Dead- Horse shit vs. Dog shit

SPECIAL HONORARY MENTION PART ONE!
64- The Complete Album Collection Vol. 1- How the heck do you rank this thing?

DOUBLE SPECIAL HONORARY MENTION PART TWO!!
Seriously, no fucking about, go find the Tree With Roots bootleg, it covers all 100+ recordings from the "Basement Tapes", and if this were an official release it would probably be stealing the top spot.  Yes, it's that good.

TRIPLE SPECIAL HONORARY MENTION PART THREE!!!
Bob really mangled what could have been three masterpieces- Shot Of Love, Infidels, and Oh Mercy.  Advanced studies of the bootlegs are strongly suggested.

BEST ONE YET

An Irish Joke

SCOTT ASHETON

Forever The Real Rock Action

Saw him play live twice. Left me deliriously breathless twice. The fuckin' man.